We throw off the lie of perfection and cling to our identity in God as we strive to be whole, healthy, and fit. Our goal is wholeness, not perfection.

Posts tagged ‘postpartum’

A Message for Fit Moms

I’m reading You’re Already Amazing by Holley Gerth (read it and stop by here every Monday to join the conversation) and this paragraph stopped me in my tracks. It couldn’t have come at a more perfect time, because a friend of mine was feeling defeated by a workout she has been doing.

Making progress in life is hard work. When we insist on moving forward as quickly as possible, we can wear ourselves out in a hurry. Sometimes when God makes us wait, it’s one of the most merciful things he can do. It doesn’t inherently mean we’ve done something wrong. In fact, it can indicate just the opposite – that we’re right between some really big things God has for our lives, and we need to rest up.

I shared the paragraph with her and let her know that I can totally relate to wanting to be better/stronger/smaller/more fit/smarter/more experienced/whatever right NOW. It can be difficult, disheartening even, to not make progress at the pace I would prefer. But then God slows me down and I’m able to be grateful for the progress I’ve already made. I can easily forget that I just had babies, because they’re growing so fast. Not to mention what carrying them for 37 weeks did to my body. Our bodies are amazing for enduring what they did to carry and birth children. We (and I’m totally speaking to myself here) need to be patient and loving as we ask our bodies, often force them, to do things that will make them stronger in the long run but hurt right now.

As difficult as it can be, I sometimes like to have to talk to myself as though I’m talking to my 7 year old.  He is every bit the perfectionist that I am, which can lead to frustration and heartache on his part.  And lots of nevers.  Like “I’ll never be good at” this or that.  When these words come out of his mouth I call him over to me, pet and cup his face with my hand, look him straight in the eyes and tell him – “Yet.  You’re not good at it, yet.”

So to my fellow fit moms (moms working on their fitness) I say – be grateful for the ability to do what you can.  Try not to focus on what you used to do or what you can’t do, yet. I’ve found amazing women to walk alongside on my journey – via Facebook, Instagram, and even Twitter – a tribe if you will.  When the lie of perfectionism hisses, we speak truth over one another.  Do you have a tribe of truth speaking, encouraging accountability partners?

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No Filter

I have been hesitant to  I have been reluctant to  I have been afraid to post postpartum pictures of myself on Instagram or Facebook.  Easter was unavoidable because we had family over and everyone was taking pictures.  How could I tell them, “No thanks, I’d rather wait until my skin clears up, my face isn’t so round, and I’m back to my pre-pregnancy weight”?  But if you look at my FB wall, or my IG profile, you’ll see that on Easter Sunday I flooded both accounts with pictures of my boys and posted just a couple of pictures with me in the shot.  Other than Easter, I think I have a handful of pictures with me up, but I’m either wearing make-up or used a filter.  and I most definitely strategized (auto correct tells me I just made up a word) so as to avoid showing any rolls or squishy bits.

I’ve never considered myself a particularly vain person.  Maybe when I was a pre-teen, but that was really to cover up other insecurities.  But pregnancy – especially a multiples pregnancy – can change a girl.  I didn’t mind belly pictures while I was pregnant because God was growing two miracles inside me.  But I wouldn’t let anyone capture my image unless I was wearing make-up.  And I probably still applied a filter.  Pregnancy hormones are no joke and they did a number on my skin.  I had never experienced acne like that.  And I not only had the pleasure of being embarrassed while I was afflicted with the acne, I now have the pleasure of wearing the scars. Oh, the joys of having the skin pigmentation of a “whitish brown” (you can thank DJ for that one) girl.

I felt like I had to wear make-up at all times, filter all pictures, and explain that I was pregnant with twins if anyone ever saw me without make-up.  That is, until just recently.  In May I rediscovered Francheska of “Hey Fran Hey”. I got a serious girl crush on her a couple of years ago, as she is curly girl.  And I consider all curly girls to be my curly-haired sisters.  She’s all about being healthy by being natural – clean eating; DIY hair, skin, and body care.  While I’m not quite ready to dive back into the world of eating clean, I did feel prompted by God to take off the mask I created with make-up.  I had to admit that I was looking for security more in make-up than I was in Him.  I was letting it define me whether I was wearing it or not.

So, I packed up my make-up and started following Francheska’s lead.  I took a picture of myself on “Day 1” of my new skincare regimen.  I almost posted it.  I thought better of it.  I talked myself out of it “I’ll save it and use it as the ‘Before’ when I share the ‘After’ in six months.”  That is the much safer route, isn’t it?  Isn’t that the allure of “Transformation Tuesday”, “Throwback Thursday”, and “Flashback Friday”?  We can securely post a picture of our “Before” because we can confidently point to our “After”.  Unless we can’t.

I couldn’t.  I didn’t feel confident in pointing to my “After”.  And to be honest with you, I still don’t.  My “Before” is a glowing, even through make-up, mother-to-be. My “Before Before” is a strong, fit, and trim group fitness instructor.  My “After”?  I’ve been far from confident in my “After”. Frankly, I’ve been ashamed to post my picture.  And I find myself wanting to somehow mention that I just had twins – either in conversation or in the caption of a picture.

I’m working on it though.  Today I posted my first postpartum, no make-up, no filter selfie to Instagram.  I posted it on my new IG account, @catalyst_move, that is connected to Catalyst Movement – this blog and the Catalyst Movement ministry.  Some people may see the picture and wonder “What’s the big deal?”  For me, letting go of security blankets, masks, false idols – whatever you want to call them – is always difficult.  Even though I know that letting go allows me to better grasp onto my true security.  Have you let go of anything lately?  Is there something God is prompting you to let go of?

No Filter

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