We throw off the lie of perfection and cling to our identity in God as we strive to be whole, healthy, and fit. Our goal is wholeness, not perfection.

Posts tagged ‘overwhelmed’

12 Days of Christmas: Day 8 – Recharge

8th day

…my blogger friends gave to me: The permission to Recharge

Yes, I know that the 12th day of Christmas as January 6th.  But this year I have committed to finishing what I start.  Even if it isn’t the finish product I had in mind when I started.  I began writing this entry over a week ago.  But I realize now that the entry I started could easily be a blog series, so instead of trying to fit all of those words and emotions into a single blog entry I am choosing to start anew.

As women – regardless of our marital status, career choice, and maternal status – we busy ourselves and fill our days with meeting the needs of other people.  Real or imagined.  (The needs, not the people.  Who’s got time to meet the needs of imaginary people?)   We get so busy tending to husbands, bosses, co-workers, children, friends – not to mention the tasks on our to do lists – that we tend to put our needs last.  And we don’t realize how overwhelmed we are until our patience is running low and we’re struggling to find kind words or a gentle tone.

So, in 2015 I propose that we start setting aside time to recharge, to refuel.  Nothing crazy, maybe once a quarter.  Find a one day women’s conference in town.  Or a weekend retreat a few hours away.  I totally recommend the latter.  There’s something heavenly about waking up to quiet, knowing that all your meals will be made by someone else and you don’t have to clean up the dishes.  Did you just breathe a sigh of relief when you read that?  I did.  And then when you return home you are pleasantly surprised at just how ecstatic you are to be welcomed by a messy and loud house.

A search of “one day women’s conferences” on Google returned 254,000,000 results in 0.29 seconds.  “Women’s weekend retreat” only had 31,000,000 results in 0.26 seconds, but that’s still plenty of options.  Don’t want anything as formal as a conference or a retreat?  Then make a standing date with some friends for a mom’s night out or join a small group.  Just make sure that whatever is meant to refuel you doesn’t add to the stress that you’re seeking to alleviate.

Do you have a refueling plan for 2015?  If so, what is it?  If not, is there anything you did to refuel in 2014 that you’d like to do again in 2015?

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Amateur Juggler (October 4th)

I need to take care of myself.  What does it look like to you to take care of yourself?  There’s basic hygiene, water, nutrition – you know, the basics.  I’m just wondering how other full time working moms take care of themselves.  I remember doing it when my son was a toddler up until the time I got pregnant with the twins.  I did it with the help of having a membership to the Y, and then being a group fitness instructor.  So that kept me accountable because if I didn’t show up to class then class didn’t happen.  But now that I have twins and I’m back at work, I don’t really know what it looks like to take care of myself during this season.

I know sleep is a huge priority (as I yawn).  I know that spending time with God is a priority, but it seems like it’s something I don’t ever get around to, not how I used to, not how I’d like to.  I haven’t worked out in a really long time and I can feel my body craving all the good chemicals I get from working out.  I know I need to go out on a date with my husband.  It feels like it’s been forever since we went somewhere that wasn’t church or with family.

I know there are things I can do to take care of myself, I just don’t see how to juggle it all.  I’m missing margin in my day.  I need white space.  I need…how do you clear things off of your calendar and to-do list when all of the stuff has to be done?  I have a friend of mine at work who used to joke with me “Reina, all you need to do is get yourself a wife.”  All I know is I feel overwhelmed and spent.  So if you’ve got tips or suggestions on how to refocus energy and time, I’d love to hear them.

On My Heart

Airplane landing

Our seven year old son flew out of Charlotte by himself yesterday.  I don’t know how I feel about it.  I am overwhelmed with a slew of emotions when I think about him flying across the country and spending two weeks with my parents (one week per set of parents) – alone.

I wasn’t worried about the flying part of the trip.  He’s been traveling to California since he was nine months old and has flown at least a dozen times round trip since then.  I know that he’s mature enough to fly solo – he knows how to behave on an airplane.  I guess it comes down to me being a little freaked out that I have a seven year old who is mature enough to fly solo.  In all of twenty seconds my thoughts race from flying solo to him going to middle school, high school, and then leaving home for college.

During our nighttime prayer and cuddle time I cried as I prayed for traveling mercies for his flights and his time in California.  He comforted me as best he could when I told him that he’s growing up too fast.  “I’ll still love you when I’m older,” he said.  “I know, but it will be different when you’re big and out of the house,” I replied.  “That’s like eleven or twelve years away, Mommy.  And I’ll come visit you every day.”  I cried harder, because I knew he meant it.  Just like I meant it when I told my dad I would always hang out with him, no matter how old I was.

I don’t have any poignant ending to this post.  I just wanted to share what’s on my heart.  I’m not familiar with the readers of this blog, yet.  I don’t know who’s in the audience.  But if you can relate or have any  words of wisdom to share, I’d greatly appreciate it.

First Blog Post (5/07/13)

This was my first blog entry for the blog I never published.  I had a domain and everything.  I even typed it up but never published it.  I wanted it to be perfect.  I still struggle with the lie of perfectionism.  It is a daily struggle rooted in fear.  But I know that love is greater than fear, and I have decided to just “Say It” – whatever IT may be. (See “Say It” for more background info).

I lost some important items in the past several days.  I would dress it up and say “misplaced” but the simple truth is – I lost them.  Did I immediately pray and ask God to reveal the location of each item (as I’ve taught my son to do)?  Nope.  With the exception of two of the items (debit card and checkbook), I really didn’t get overly concerned until I truly needed them.

The first thing I prayed to find was the charger for the Nook my son and I share.  That was last Thursday.  My son and I scoured the house and car looking for it.  I even searched my work area, i.e. my desk and bookcase, of my classroom.  At one point DJ asked if I had prayed yet.  I told him I had and he suggested I try again.  I found it this morning when I finally unplugged a boombox my husband rarely uses but insists on keeping plugged into an outlet in the bathroom.  I had been meaning to unplug it for days but had too many more important things begging for my time and attention.

The next item I prayed about was my debit card.  I really didn’t want to see that look on my husband’s face – the one reserved for  me losing important things – again.  I trusted that it hadn’t fallen into the clutches of evildoers.  So, I prayed that God would give me peace until I found the card.

Now the checkbook kind of flustered me, I must admit.  The only reason I had it on me was because I couldn’t find the debit card. It was raining, my son was grumpy and hungry upon waking up from a three hour nap and I just wanted to get home.  Needless to say I was juggling too much to properly search for the checkbook.  So I used my personal – well, actually, my health and fitness business – debit card. I didn’t even bother to pray about it.  Well, I may have asked God to to let it fall into the hands of evildoers.

When I got to work on Monday I found my debit card.  Actually, my substitute found it and displayed it in such a manner that I could clearly see it but the wandering eyes of evildoers could not.  I found my checkbook as I went to grab my work ID from the side panel of my car door this morning.

So what have I learned over the last five days? Juggling too many tasks is when I typically lose something.  Be it something tangible like a debit card or intangible like peace, joy, patience, and gentleness.  Avoiding tasks is usually when I miss the opportunity to find those lost things.  I’m very grateful that my God is in the Lost and Found business.

side note: DJ and I are big Marvel and DC comic fans.  Hence all the references to evildoers.

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